Ewwww .... gross.

[soulswallo]

OMG! I was having the weirdest dreams last night. I can't remember them at all at this point but I do remember waking up and thinking Hahahahaha! Wow!

I'm in a much better mood than I was yesterday. I have no idea what that was but it was banished by watching the first 2 Final Destination movies. I think I'll review those. They're just so damn fun.

By the by, I think part of yesterday's bitchiness was caused by staying up way too late and getting up way too early. 4 hours of sleep is enough for a normal person, isn't it? I think I need to lay off the fanfic late at night. It sucks me in and makes me lose track of time. Damn those fantastic writers out there! I'm currently alternating between Firefly and Terminator Salvation (Blair and Marcus all the way, babies!) fic. There's not a ton of TS out there (and even less that's well written and in character) but the FF more than makes up for that lack.

I don't think I'm going to get out of my pjs today. Nope. It just feels like the right thing to do. How can I argue with such a feeling? I can't.

I was thinking last night (between bouts of fanfic reading) about this time last year and I can't believe what a difference quitting my job and learning to unwind has done for my mental well-being. I was so depressed at the end of 2008 and beginning of last year. I felt trapped by that job and all the pressure it heaped on me. Now I'm reading about some of the stuff my old co-workers are going through (those that still work at the bank) and I'm so happy that I made the monumental decision to quit. And it was monumental. I fretted about it endlessly. How could I quit my job when I had just bought a house? How could I put my family in that position?

On the other hand, how far can a person be pushed before they simply break in two? I was close to that point. I was close to just crumbling under it all. I pretty much think that crying at the drop of a hat everyday at work is not a good sign.

So, I walked away.

You know, I had big plans to get my writing career going strong. That hasn't happened so much but I'm still happy with where things are. More or less. I'm going to write more this year.

Heather wants to go grocery shopping.
I'm out.

Comments

[slayerjenn]

4 hours of sleep? That's definitely would lead to a bad mood. I speak from experience! I myself had some strange dreams last night, I think in part to going to bed so late last night.

Good luck with your fanfics!

[soulswallo.livejournal.com]

Although I was only getting 4 or so hours of sleep a night, I do take a nap every day. A long one. That helps to offset the short bedtime.
Thanks!

[malkovich03.livejournal.com]

I was going to ask I'd you are referring to lauras facebook post, but geez, it could really be anyone who still works there. They all have the same story. I keep asking why the don't interview somewhere else? The stress of changing banks is nothing compared to the stress they're under.

[malkovich03.livejournal.com]

if not I'd. Crazy blackberry

[soulswallo.livejournal.com]

Don't worry, I can totally decipher your crazy speak.

[soulswallo.livejournal.com]

Every WFB employee. Seriously, it's like the seventh circle of Hell there or something. The sad part is that if I hadn't had my breakdown I'd probably be right in the middle of all of that thinking that there was no way out. Yuck!

[jenah.livejournal.com]

I certain can and will attest to your much calmer and happier mental state these days. I know it was a hard decision to make but the quality of your life is loads better. Good on ya.

[soulswallo.livejournal.com]

Yes, I don't feel as homicidal nearly as often now. :P

[townbros.livejournal.com]

I always have weird dreams.
Because I also try to manipulate them by letting my conscious actually get into them and change things around, I think my subconscious likes to retaliate. Yes, I like to exert a far amount of mind control on myself.
Sometimes, I have "theme" nights.

One night I had "naked people" night. Unfortunately, it is never the sexy and hot "naked" themes. 2 nights ago I dreamed about a naked version of the Newlywed Game and even had that Bob Eubanks as the host. This one overweight middle age guy was shaking his ass into the "camera" doing a happy dance at one point during the game show.
Oh damn you, subconscious!

One night I had a "zombie" dream that I swear that was totally inspired by that Ninja cat viral. I hope you have seen it already. The one where the cat stands motionless, but whenever the camera is out of sight the cat finally moves. And then stands motionless again when the camera is back on the cat.
I had that happen with a dead body.
What is really weird is the dead corpse was Jon Pertwee from 1960s Doctor Who TV series. I would be looking at him, and he would have one facial expression, but he would be there motionless and dead.
I look away and look back, and then he would be doing something like sticking his tongue out at me.
I look away and back again, and he has this stupid facial expression where he contorts his face. Still motionless and dead when I am actually looking straight at him.
I look away and look back, and now he has one arm reaching out for me. OI!
You could also say it would be like that Blink episode of Doctor Who where the statues were attacking people.
I walk away and look back, and the dude has moved his position. Like he was following me, and now he has two arms forward as if he were like the Frankenstein monster.
Did I mention that while I was being chased by zombie Jon Pertwee, that I was naked too?
Yup, fun to be had on naked dreams night. DOH!

[soulswallo.livejournal.com]

Your naked dream had me cracking up! Like, whoa!

I've always loved how my dreams tend to be like little movies or books in my head. There's just something so fabulous about that.